How I Met My Girlfriend

Mood: Slightly confused

I can't be bothered uploading the newer pics from my camera so satisfy yourselves on this 3 month old snowy picture

OK, it’s still technically April Fool’s Day here so please don’t be too surprised when I tell you that I do not in fact have a girlfriend. Sorry for falsely breaking your hearts ladies. Actually while we’re on the topic, the other day I was talking to my mum on Skype and she said that I should trim my sideburns. I asked her why, and she replied that my horoscope indicated that I would be possibly meeting my future wife soon, and that she didn’t want them to scare her off. Well mum, guess what, I went to the movies last night (more on this later) and I’m pretty sure I was being checked out by a group of girls. OK it may have only been one of them, and there is a possibility she was just flicking her hair. But it’s clear the sidies enhance my sex appeal.

Another thing that may have potentially increased my (already substantial) sex appeal is the fact that I’ve lost a lot of weight. I haven’t yet figured out how this has happened, as my diet hasn’t been especially healthy. But I can confidently say it has nothing to do with the box of Special K I bought in Malaysia, which is still sitting unopened in my cupboard in Southampton. Whatever the reason, I’m slightly concerned that I’ve become malnourished here – I won’t rest easy until I’ve put on enough weight so that I take up only three holes on my belt again, rather than the current four.

As it’s the Easter holidays now, I’ve been up in London. This means that I’ve had a lot more spare time, and thus have seen three movies in the past week. The first one was a Tamil film called Angadi Theru. It’s been getting rave reviews, but I found it bloody depressing. A bit like Slumdog Millionaire, actually – how it won eight Oscars and was called ‘feel-good’ when I walked out of it feeling lower than the ground floor of the UWA Architecture Library is beyond me. Normally, you wouldn’t call me a cynical person (or perhaps cynically, you wouldn’t call me a normal person) but I don’t think a guy and a girl getting together is going to suddenly brighten the lives of the 300 million (or whatever the figure is) people living in poverty in India, despite what some lame ending dance scene may otherwise indicate. But I digress. The other two were The Bounty Hunter, which was so full of fluff that I’ve forgotten/am trying to forget half of what happened, and The Blind Side, which was my favourite of the three. (Damn I’m good at this, should try to get a job as a movie reviewer…)

Anyhow, most of the rest of my life has been fairly uneventful. I spent an enjoyable few days last week staying with a cousin, who’s just turned 16 and could probably beat me in a fight (admittedly, this is not that hard). Hopefully I’ll start doing some more exciting things than studying life tables (even more boring than it sounds) and teaching my aunty how to open a Word document and insert some WordArt.

Another old picture, I think this one's from Cambridge

Before I finish I should probably announce the answer to the maths question of two posts ago – you need to live until you’re 96, and there’s about a 0.05 chance of you living to this age. I might get around to putting the working out up some time in the future, but I know that none of you will actually read it, so it won’t actually matter. NEXT QUESTION: does 0.99999999 (recurring) = 1? State why/why not.

Love you all, talk soon.